The Bachelorette 2013: Ten Things We Learned About Acrobats, Exes and How to Win Over Desiree Hartsock!

Desiree Hartsock and Kasey's Dinner Date on The Bachelorette

1. Give ten guys a ball and watch out!

It was no holds barred as the first group date went down. Brooks, Mikey, Chris, Michael and Brandon joined forces as the red team as Ben, Drew, Zack, Brad and Brian teamed up on the blue side playing dodge ball to win Des’ heart. The team that wins two out of three games gets to spend extra time with Des. Of course the red team wins one game and the blue team wins the other, and ultimately it’s down to one player on each team to win the last game. The intense looks on their faces was near scary as balls pelted across the court at each other. In the end the blue team conquers!

2. Des doesn’t care about the rules!

Who doesn’t love a bad ass? Des doesn’t care what the producers say,she wants more time with her men, so she invites all ten guys to the after party! Too bad Brooks is banged up in the ER with a broken finger. *sigh* The rest of the guys met over drinks with her and fought for one-on-one time. In the end Chris impressed Des the most opening up and got the rose.

3. The Bachelorette is just full of bad acting.

All week we awaited the huge confrontation between Brian Jarosinski and his “girlfriend” from back home. What a disappointment! Could she at least have tried to be believable when she was yelling at him about humiliating her and being a bad role model? Sorry honey, but you chose to go on The Bachelorette to confront him and air your dirty laundry on national television. Oh and let’s not forget to point out that sleeping with someone does not mean you are in a relationship. Sorry you had to learn the hard way.

4. Brandon needs to get the waterworks under control. It’s getting awkward.

Every week the tears come more and more from bachelor Brandon! This week he was crying about his past not once, but twice! We’re sorry your mom had boyfriends come and go in your life, but maybe you should seek professional help instead of crying to Des for pity each week.

Bandaloop performs on The Bachelorette

5. Acrobats ain’t easy.

Kasey was the only guy to get a one-on-one date this week and quite a daring date it was! Des and Kasey learned how to “dance” on the side of a skyscraper where he nearly dropped her! The good news is everything went as planned and despite a lack of chemistry (unlike last week), Kasey went home with a rose!

6. The producers pair the worst guys together. Don’t pull all the good ones together and save the dull ones for the end!

The second group date consisted of Zak, Bryden, James, Juan and Dan. I’m not shy, I’ll say it.. the good ones were all in the first group! Sure, the editing tries to make Bryden appear as a front runner, but he lacks any personality. Juan Pablo is easy on the eyes and ears, but sticks out in no other way. James, Zak and Dan have made no impact on the show whatsoever thus far.

7. Have a great sob story and get a rose.

Though Bryden and Juan Pablo have the best chemistry with Des out of the group, James tells Des about his family and the struggles he is going through. Ultimately (and out of pity) Des gives him a rose for opening up to her. Let’s be honest- Juan Pablo totally had that one in the bag.

8. The world does not revolve around Ben Scott.. even if he thinks so.

Ohhh the Tierra of The Bachelorette. We’re all sick of you and know that you are a jerk at heart. Sure, you’re all in this competition to “win” Des, but it’s beyond clear that you only care about winning the game. The other guys are more interested in winning her heart. Ben stole Des away for a road trip knowing the guys were all waiting at the pool for some one-on-one time. When the guys confronted him, of course he lied to their faces. If you’re going to be a jerk, at least own up to it!

9. Speak up and leave a mark.

Brandon tried too hard to make Des feel bad for him. He was convinced that he was falling for her, but Des was clearly more freaked out about his intimacy issues than he was. When he went in for his “secret” kiss, I couldn’t be the only one in America cringing at the awkwardness of it all. I also couldn’t have been the only one who wasn’t surprised that he went home. Oh, Dan went home, too.. but who was he again?

10. DON’T CONFRONT DES ABOUT THE OTHER GUYS!

Next week’s preview shows plenty of drama, as well as the biggest mistake one person makes EVERY SEASON on The Bachelor and The Bachelorette. Bryden is ready to confront Des about Ben’s ill intentions. Clearly he’s no fan of the show. If he was he would know that it’s signing his death wish! Des isn’t going to care about the drama, she’s going to want each guy to worry about himself.. just like all the others before her! Don’t be a busy body and mind your business!

 

Do you think Des made the right choice sending home Brandon and that other guy this week?

 

by Melissa Warner on June 11th, 2013

Melissa is Unreality TV's X Factor USA expert, bringing you all the gossip on the contestants and religiously recapping their performances each week! You can follow her on Twitter and on Google+

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